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Friday, November 21, 2014

Righteous VS Self-Righteous Living

This subject is something I struggle with every time I sit down to write a post.  I want to write to inspire, without coming off as self-righteous.  It's a difficult thing to do.  But lately it's been a difficult thing for me in life as well.  Others are often trying to "help" me with suggestions of what I or my family should be doing, but all they end of doing is "help" me feel bad about myself.  I'm all for doing good things, but I'd rather do it in a way that doesn't make someone feel bad about themselves.

Here's a for instance. I don't drink. (Alcohol)  Never have.  Never will.  That's my choice.  But that doesn't mean that I am going to walk up to you and tell you that you shouldn't drink.  If you ask me,  I will tell you my opinion, and I'll tell you why, but I'm not going to tell you what I think you need to do.  See the difference?

Here are some of my thoughts about how we can keep our morals and standards without hurting others in the process.

First of all, be yourself.  Don't live based on what others might think of you, and don't judge others based on what you see.  Live your life the way you want to, but let those around you have the same freedom.
Don't judge.  Be aware of others and their needs but don't judge them.  Offering advice when you see a need can often come off as judgmental instead of helpful.  Sometimes it's best not to offer advice when you observe something that you think needs help.  It might be best to wait and offer your advice at a different time, or not at all.  Also keep in mind that everyone is in a different place.  What works for you might not work for them, or interest them, or even be important to them.  Again, don't judge!

Be an Example.  Let your light shine, as they say.  Let your actions speak instead of your mouth.  People are more easily inspired by observation rather than instruction. 

Be a friend.  Sometimes we think we shouldn't be friends with people that have different beliefs/standards, etc.  I disagree.  We should be friends with anyone that we get a long with.  Did you hear that?  Not everyone.  Some people just don't get a long.  But we should be friends with anyone that we get a long with.  It would be pretty boring if we only hung out with people that were exactly like us.  Some of the most beautiful friendships are ones in which our differences are accepted and loved.

It is good to have moral and standards.  It's good to share those thoughts and beliefs.  Just try not to do it in a harmful or hurtful way.  Most importantly love those around you, even if they are different than you.